Imke Spilker on "Scratching an Itch"

An email exchange with Imke Spilker about the two “Scratching an Itch” blog entries: http://wordsabouthorses.blogspot.com/2010/04/touch-and-spirit-of-scratching-itch.html#comments and http://wordsabouthorses.blogspot.com/2010/03/scratching-itch.html#comments

led to a very generous offer from her and the Communicative Horses -- namely, to teach a “virtual seminar” here on this endlessly fascinating topic.

Imke has kindly provided the photos and video of the Communicative Horses which you see in this entry, as well as all the italicized text (my translation). Starring in the video clips and in most of the photos are Joy (the darker horse with the star on her forehead) and Hazel. In the last photo, Shane makes an appearance. He's the grey horse.

What follows is an outline, a sketch, of a “scratch lesson” that is often part of Imke’s introductory clinics. The first part is intended for people who can actually go out into a group of horses and observe them at their grooming. Those of us who do not have access to such a group are invited to watch the film clips and study the still photos provided here. Let the feeling, the "ambience", of the photos and video inform you along with what is actually depicted.

Joy

Hazel

"HazelandJoy"

"The way horses groom one another is a wonderful and very visible example of how horses conduct their social life. No dominant Pascha in the middle of his harem letting himself be serviced with scratches by his underlings. Nor is there “appeasement scratching” as among monkeys. Instead, there is reciprocity as determined by each other.

We only have to observe... the horses will explain everything to us...."

.

“As you observe horses at their grooming ask yourself:

‘How do they begin?’

‘How do they decide between themselves where, and when, and with how much intensity the one should work on the other?’

‘How do the changes in location, tempo, and intensity occur?’

‘Take your time and move slowly around the horses. Watch the pair who are grooming one another. Can you recognize a leader, one whose behavior the other follows? If your answer is “yes”, look again! This changes. Look for the transitions.....’

Note: It could be that one horse has a greater itch, and therefore requires more scratching than the other. Because of that he will more frequently take the initiative and begin the grooming anew. But, his partner determines just as much, although in the opposite direction, in other words, as a “brake” on the proceedings. Both have equal access and equal rights to the “tuning dial” which controls the intensity of the grooming.

Does this remind you of anything in your experience?

Some of us may be reminded of the Taoist Yin-Yang symbol.

The musicians among us may be reminded of the feel of a good jam session.

Some may be tempted to say “dancing”, but I find that more problematical since, in dancing, there is often a correct sequence of steps to be followed and the need for one partner to lead.

Most people grasp this reciprocity/balance/overriding unity/Yin-Yang principle relatively quickly and intuitively. Some first have to experience it directly to internalize it.

I see scratching as a good entry point, particularly for those people who want to do something “hands on.” For many, “scratching an itch” is the first experience of doing something mutual, something reciprocal, with a horse -- and the value of that cannot be overstated.

We have to draw a clear distinction between the mutual grooming of befriended horses, which is above all a social act of togetherness, and the utilitarian scratching of an itch that a horse would do on his own, perhaps with the aid of a wall or a tree, or sometimes, a human being. Befriended horses groom each other in certain specific body zones -- their mutual exchange has little to do with an individual’s itch in a particular spot. They can perhaps eventually develop their mutual scratching to encompass each individual’s specific needs (how they do that is a somewhat different topic), but it is not (!) the starting point.

The kind of scratching we’re talking about here -- offered by a human being to a horse -- belongs in the category of “giving aids, assisting, making-ourselves-useful-to-the-horse.” It can be simply a nice gesture. But, in doing this, perhaps we can also convey to the horse that we might have all sorts of other things to offer that he would find useful or beneficial....

There is not too much danger of becoming “Aunt Griselda” as long as the horse has sufficient space and is able to live like a horse at least some of the time. If your touch is unwelcome, the horse will leave.

However, there is another “danger”, namely: getting stuck scratching only at the superficial level. By this I mean being concerned only with the horse’s “scratch ecstasy” (i.e. the goal, the results), instead of seeking the dialog, the deepening of the relationship, as horses do with this act. Horses do not serve each other, they do something nice for one another, thereby strengthening the bond between them.

For us humans this can be rather difficult -- very often, when we are not in the role of “master” we slip easily into the role of “servant.” That is not terrible (and only harmful if we are dealing with a case of eczema which will worsen with our scratching and drive the sufferer into deeper misery), but it is a pity, a waste of a golden opportunity to further the relationship with a horse.”

KM: I can see this happening quite easily... especially when a person is nervous/fearful about the horse “grooming” him. How do you help a person to recognize when they are falling into “server” mode, and how do you help him shift gears, back into mutuality, into dialog? (The only thing that comes to mind is to ask a person to stay tuned to his own feelings, and if he feels resentment, or boredom, or tiredness, or ??? creeping in, to acknowledge that and realize that it is a sign of mutuality evaporating. And then what? )

“With Communicative Horses the answer to your question is very simple. The horse will turn around and say “Hey, what’s going on?” or he’ll leave, or he’ll give you a little push or maybe even a nip. That is a very surefire way to become aware that you’ve gotten off the track.

One response to the fear of being “groomed” by horses is the observation and understanding of the principles of why and how horses groom each other. To me, withdrawing into your own world of feelings could be problematical. If you pull back -- okay. But do it completely -- mind and body. To have your hand on the horse while exploring your own world of feeling, or following a train of thought --- that frustrates many horses. It is like putting up a fence around yourself. Better to ask the horse for active aids.”

Note from KM: I did not mean a contraction of awareness into oneself, but an expansion of awareness. Instead of focusing solely on the horse’s scratch ecstasy (i.e. the result, the goal), expand awareness to take in not only the horse’s physical expression but the feeling underlying it and your own feelings as you scratch. Notice what you are feeling as well as what he is feeling.

On another aspect: Some time ago we discussed Khe-Ra’s aggressive demands to be scratched and her anger when I wanted to stop before she was ready to let me stop. Recently I’ve heard about quite a number of horses who are showing the same behaviors. A friend told me about them, so I do not know anything about the horses’ backgrounds or the relationships between the different horses and humans... Is this something you’ve encountered? Do you have any thoughts on this?

“What you describe happens quite often. And, from a certain perspective, it is quite logical. The social behavior of mutual grooming is permeated with the principle of reciprocity. When horses behave according to the human rule ‘make the right behavior pleasant and easy, make the wrong/undesirable behavior unpleasant and hard’ things look like what you have described. You can be sure that horses who want to force their human partners in such intimate situations have themselves already been forced by human “partners.” These horses are only doing what they have learned from us, they are acting in the same pattern and rhythm.

Horses, too, have varying cultures of living together and we humans have a great deal of influence on they way they conduct their social life, be it though the lifestyle in which we keep them or because of our direct contact.

You can see very well in the video clip the overriding unity of the interaction, how two act as one. The horses raise the intensity of the grooming together, and then, together, lower it again. They stop together, and begin again together. It is as though they were playing music with one another -- notice the rhythm and tempo. In other words, it is not so much where they are touching each other, but when and how.

Scratching an itch undermines hierarchy, so much so that many “dominance professionals” deliberately advise against it. Instead, they choose a “pseudo-touching”, that the horse must passively accept (like everything that we do “to” him).

Lucky for us that horses hardly ever answer us in the way that we respond to them. Otherwise they would strike us, deliberately frighten us, lock us in, use us up, and eat us. They only sometimes respond to us that way when we approach them on the “friendship track”.

When we approach a horse this way, we open ourselves to him and thus expose him to our egocentric culture -- insofar as aspects of that culture are still perceptible in our thoughts, feelings, and actions. The horse identifies with us -- at least partially. We might transmit a message that goes something like this: “Okay, you may enter our club. Here among us the law of the stronger is what counts. We beat, punish, and take advantage of each other. Each takes only himself into consideration.” In short: “You fit in by getting your way.” (These days very many man-made herds are riddled with this human principle of “each-against-the-other”. Mutual grooming seldom happens then.)

He who wants to be master, to rule, and insists upon his privilege should keep his distance and not pretend to be chummy. This applies among humans, too.

What happens if we want out of this “devil’s circle” of distance-dominance?

The most important thing is that our desire for a different relationship with a horse is absolutely genuine. We must be willing to “dive in.” Putting one foot in to test the water won’t work and will convince neither man nor horse of our sincerity.

It must be clear in my thinking as well as my actions that I am no longer ready or willing to act against the horse in any way, shape, or form. It is barely possible to describe this attitude in a concrete way because it shows up in so many little everyday things. And, yet, one notices right away when a person has had this change of heart. Whether I am right or not, whether or not I feel threatened -- I never act against the horse, only for him and in his spirit.”

"ShaneandHazel"